During a sad four-month emotional affair with a married man I’d known seventeen years, and many years after that of depression and broken-hearted misery, I determined to learn as much about infidelity as I could. Not just the prejudice, condemnation, and the old saws that come out of everyone’s mouth as soon as they hear someone they know got caught cheating, but the TRUTH.

The truth is so much more than, “Once a cheater, always a cheater!” or, “You have to leave someone who cheated on you or you are a wimp!”

Why DO people cheat? If someone’s just blown your life away, what do you do?

This publication may be somewhat triggering if you just found out you are being cheated on. However, if you’ve been struggling in or with an affair for a while now and you need some perspective, this is your spot.

My book is here, my website is here, my pieces on YourTango are here. (I’m P.D. Reader on YourTango because they wouldn’t accept The Thinking Other Woman as a name.) The Medium publication I host that started all this is here.

I’m not going to ask anyone for money. I have people I follow on here myself, and if I gave $5 a month to all of them, it would cost me a pretty penny. After The Great Plumbing Disaster of 2023, I can’t afford to pay everyone $5 a month, and I’ll bet you can’t, either. We all know what rent, groceries, and gas cost these days. Of course, if anyone does care to be a paying subscriber, it’s deeply appreciated. Thank you!!

If you are at any point on the affair triangle right now, you have my deep sympathy. I hope I can help you make sense of things.

Thanks for being here.

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Struggling in or with an affair? This is the place for REAL DEEP THINKING.


The Thinking Other Woman

Affair-recovery; affair-related issues. I also publish on YourTango (although they wouldn't let me use "The Thinking Other Woman," so you will see me there as P.D. Reader.)